Laura El Alam

About twenty ago, a cashier at a store looked at me in my modest clothing and said, “You couldn’t get most women in this country to put on a headscarf.”

“Well,” I replied cheerfully, “you couldn’t get me to take it off!”

Although I tried to keep my tone light, deep down I was bracing myself for a debate or a lecture. After all, he was not the first stranger to comment on my hijab, and sadly some of my previous interactions had been less than pleasant. In fact, I often found myself feeling defensive whenever strangers spoke to me about my faith or my clothing. Maybe that’s why the cashier’s next words surprised me.

“I’ve been searching for the truth for a long time,” he said. “I was raised Christian but I don’t practice anymore. What made you want to become a Muslim?”

His candor was unexpected, and I wanted to give him a sincere and inspiring answer.  However, I wasn’t really prepared to explain my whole spiritual journey in the checkout line, so I gave him some quick advice: “Learn about Islam from reputable sources. Don’t judge the religion by what you might see some Muslims doing, or by how the media portrays us. People are flawed, but Islam is perfect.” I promised to bring my husband with me in the future, so the cashier could ask more questions if he wished.

That encounter taught me not to jump to conclusions. Not all non-Muslims were trying to pick a fight when they commented on my hijab. Some of them genuinely wanted to learn and understand, but they didn’t have the resources to learn about Islam, so they sought information from strangers like me.

As the years went by, the internet started offering a great deal of quality information about Islam. With a few clicks, non-Muslims could search for any topic they wanted. Surely, I thought, it’s not still my job to educate people?

After all, if they wanted to know the purpose of hijab, or the rules of fasting during Ramadan, or the Islamic stance on dating, they could just Google it, right?

Apparently not. The questions kept coming. Once, I was invited to speak with the youth group at a local Universal Unitarian church. The parishoners were extremely kind and welcoming. They explained that they wanted the young members of their community to understand all the world’s religions, including Islam.

I was prepared to talk with kids ages nine through thirteen, but several adults chose to attend the session. It was clear that they were highly educated, open-minded, and cultured. They certainly could have searched the internet for answers to their questions, but they wanted to hear the viewpoint of a real, live Muslim. To my surprise, it was mostly the adults in the room–not the children– who were positively bursting with curiosity about Islam.

That’s when I realized that even in the Information Age, human connection is a crucial aspect of dawah–inviting people to reflect on Islam. Reading a book or an article on the internet is just not the same as a face-to-face conversation. As a Muslim, my attitude, my willingness to engage, my manners, and my relatability all matter when it comes to showing others the true nature of Islam.

For converts like me who might find it overwhelming, at times, to bear such a responsibility about representing our faith, please keep a few things in mind:

  1. You don’t need to have all the answers. If you’re unsure of how to respond to someone’s question, you can encourage them to look up the information they seek on a reputable Islamic website like WhyIslam or others (below).
  2. If you are doing your best to be patient, honest, wholesome, and kind, then you are already teaching them about Islam in the most effective way. Your words and actions are probably more inspiring than any article they could ever read.
  3. Allah sees your efforts to convey the beauty of Islam, and He will reward you, inshaAllah.
  4. People whose practice is visible – like women who wear hijab – are going to receive the most questions from curious non-Muslims. Men can blend in more easily in a non-Muslim society, if they choose, and many go through their daily life without ever being asked about their faith. I propose to my Muslim brothers that they consider being purposely more visibly Muslim, as an act of solidarity with their sisters in faith and as an opportunity to give more dawah. A beard, thobe, kufi, and modest dress are all ways to distinguish yourself as a practicing Muslim.

For non-Muslims who have questions about Islam, here are some ideas to consider:

  1. Seek information from websites created by Muslims for educational purposes. Beware of misinformation and Islamophobia. Some reputable and useful websites are: newstaging.whyislam.org, www.yaqeeninstitute.org, www.muslimmatters.org, www.almaghrib.org.
  2. If you wish to speak with a Muslim in person, you can call 877-WHY-ISLAM. In addition, many Muslims you encounter in day-to-day life would be happy to talk with you about their faith. A polite way to ask would sound something like, “Would you mind if I asked you something about Islam? I wonder about . . .”
  3. There is a difference between respectful dialogue and debate. If you feel upset about something you’ve heard about Islam, and you just want to argue with a random Muslim to “prove them wrong,” then you are ambushing them, not communicating respectfully with them.

In Islam, curiosity is not only tolerated, it is encouraged as a path towards knowledge and understanding. The Quran instructs humankind to “ponder,” “reflect,” and “seek guidance.” Allah created humans with intellect and a sense of wonder, and we should utilize these to figure out our purpose on earth. Who created us and why? What happens after we die? What is the point of this existence? Islam has answers for these and other queries.

Sincere, respectful questions about Islam are always welcome, and there are many excellent resources for curious minds. Want to learn more about Islam? Call 877-WhyIslam. You deserve to know!